May I?

i wanna write down my random feelings in here, may i?

well it's already May actually. so welcome May and the random feelings ever.

yeaaah I'm feeling blue, i feel like i'm a pessimist person. ohmyyyy ga gue banget. i'm an optimist person actually!

but.. it's so pathetic. now i feel like i'm just a robot. they ask me then i'll do it. monotone. i hate it for sure.

and i'm being overly sensitive lately. at first i guess that's all because of pms, but i'm wrong. so i dunno why i'm being overly sensitive and i started to be alone or to keep a distance with my friends. that's my weakness in this situation and i realize that it bothers others. 

my aloofness bores others, i know. (tapi sumpah itu ga gue banget). and i want to losen up that attitude.

i just want my friends to notice me more. they never realize how sad i am when they acted like that to me. it hurts me :'''''' gue tau itu bercandaan tapi bercanda itu ada batasnya dan ada waktunya. oh my god, i've changed. i'm so weak. noooo, i'm strong! 

gue udah sering bersakit-sakit, bersusah-susah, bergrilya dari jaman gue kecil dan belum ngerti hidup itu sebenarnya apa dan buat apa, jadi gue gaboleh lemah cuma karena hal ini aja. kisah hidup gue lebih berat dari kesedihan gue yg rada sepele. ini mah gada apa2nya dibanding yg udah-udah. kalo ada yg bilang lebay berarti dia gatau gue gimana (yg sebenarnya semua orang juga gada yg tau gue gimana). coba deh tuker peran jadi gue, asal ga nangis pasti merengek-rengek hahahahaha engga deng canda. duhhhh masa kelabilan terbawa emosi banget nih gue, let it flow sahe.... semua orang itu punya cerita masing-masing yang gada duplikatnya. jadi yaa jalanin aja peran yang udah dikasih sama Tuhan dan berusaha buat merubahnya lebih baik dan ke jalan yang benar.

but i'm good at pretending so they won't know about me in depth.

I'M SO SORRY GUYS 

for all i've done, my aloofness, and my sensitivity

"people fail to notice that everyone has their own story"